Thursday, December 6, 2007

Better or Good

I realized that one person's image of you and another person's can be completely different. I realize that due to some of the circumstances that have surrounded my upbringing, and some of the choices that I've made during mu adolescence have put me in a position where those who "knew me when" would say that I am a "better person". In the course of changing my habits, rectifying past wrongs, making amends and redefining myself; I've surrounded myself with a host of people who believe I'm a "good person". Today I heard both comments said about me and I asked myself which is the more positive/productive statement. He is a "better person" or He is a "good person"? A "better person" has more leeway. You are more willing to accept mistakes or missteps. But you are also more likely to get placated and condescended to. A "good person" is a difficult line to walk. It reeks of perfection and gets lumped in naivety. A "good person" also gets the reputation that they haven't lived enough of life to where it had the opportunity to "put it's foot in their butt". A "better person" is usually not financially stable and/or struggling. A "good person" is usually well off and/or content. I'm not 100% convinced on who I am or who I want to be. That's just my opinion though, and who the hell am I?


Anonymous said...

Obviously we portray ourselves in a different perspective to individuals that become emeshed in our personal, social, and professional lives. However I do not feel your definition is accurate in describing good and better. Good has no bearing on existence and better has no bearing on security. Good is a constant and better is it's comparative form. Both can coincide with the other harmoniously. It appears as though you feel you can only be good or better. Do not limit your potential. Define yourself by your earlier years, your choices, your surroundings, your environment but do not limit yourself. Good should become better and better should complement good. So what I guess I'm trying to say is maybe you have always been a good person whom has become better. The good still exists alongside the better. Redefining, rectifying, and making amends made you believe you developed qualities of goodness or betterment but I would venture to guess those qualities were instilled all along. You are just growing, searching, and living life. Many men/women have long passed and they have been referred to as "good" people long after death so good does not equal short spans but rather the opposite in this case of life longevity. Death may have occurred early as well and goodness may have been a reference thereby excluding time subsistence.
My concern is that you are not certain who you are or who you want to be. All these words of wisdom shared on your blogspot(with the exception of the newest 2 women 1 cup) should be able to assist you in knowing who you are and what you want to be. Whatever choices you make be sure to follow what you believe to be true because in the end you answer to yourself. Do you like what you see when you look in the mirror? Don't let anyone steal that away from you. Love yourself first and foremost. If you aren't good for you then you aren't good for anyone else. Embrace the adveture of life. Do not be fearful of failure for what doesn't kill us only makes us stronger. Bona Fortuna on your identity quest.

Anonymous said...

No one can define you......I heard a well known Pastor Bishop TD Jakes say, people carry at least 3 different faces. "When you wake up who are you today"?

Personally, people don't show their true face with everyone.

It takes a close upfront relationship to know all the different faces one person holds.

I personally, know who I am and where I came from and the road I'm travelling on. Sometimes it's a bit rocky. We all have to search ourselves and be comfortable enough to look ourselves in the mirror and face the face. IT's going to require some change.

You may be a good person to some....You may be an evil person to others....You could be a better person to those that may have known your past and know how far you came, but you also could be less of a man/women to others.

The point here is that, no one can define or redefine you. You must stand up/own up/face up and deal with who you are. Challenge yourself to know your faults and habits that displeases you and hurts other and begin travelling on the road to change.

Good or Better means that you are striving to become all that God has created you to be. Its just that simple. You are a work in progress. Good or Better simply means that "you know" your strenghts, weaknesses, when your mad, angry, upset, happy, or sad and you know why. You are honest with yourself to take a look at your feelings and understand why you feel this way. You are honest and strong enough to face it, deal with it and let it go.

Good or Better simply means that you are working on changing all the imperfections about yourself and you are working on your own faults. Some people may know the true "Ron" and all the faces that he carrys. The nice guy, good guy, bad guy, better guy, less of a guy. While others may have only seen one face.

At the end of the day, if you can lay your head to rest and know that you are a "good/better person" thats all that matters.

Strive to be all that God has made you to be and you will then see yourself as a "good/better person".

You can be both and work on all your faults while becoming both all at the same tyme.

As a counselor maybe its time that you start listening to your own advice. "Listen to your inner self" "Listen".

Lyfe is too short to worry about what does good mean and what does better mean. We get caught up on meanings that we miss the word.

lori said...

I think sometimes it is very possible that others see us better, more clearly than we see ourselves. I quantify that statement by saying that it is the people who know us best that may see us most accurately. Many people will have an opinion about you, but it may not be an informed opinion.

I can relate to your plight about which adjective you will use to describe yourself to yourself. I also know that until it rings true to you, it kinda doesn’t matter what people say, “good”, “better”, or something else entirely. Maybe you could consult with the people who know you best, and let them weigh in on the topic. I would think it would be those opinions that carry the most weight. Good luck figuring out who you are and what you want to be, remembering that it is a journey not necessarily a destination.

Anonymous said...

"Goodness is easier to recognize than to define...."

Anonymous said...

"Goodness is easier to recognize than to define...."

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